Thursday, May 28, 2009 @11:24 PM
The problem with coming clean was that you thought you were cleaning the state, starting over, but it never quite work that way. You didn't erase what you'd done. As i come to realised and understand, the stain would still be there, every time i looked at you, before i remembered to hide the disappointment in my eyes.
It was a little like a scar on a polished wooden table- you would try to see the rest of the gleaming surface, but your fingers would be drawn to the pitted part, the only thing that kept it from being perfect.
She had pretended not to see all the late nights, the missed call, the disconnections, because then she'd have been forced to make a choice.
Could you really love someone who was capable of falling in love with somebody else?
I remember reading somewhere about how courage and commitments come hand in hand together. You need courage to commit and commitment give you courage.
How often do we hear people around us expressing their fears and maybe their lack of faith to enter a commitment? How often do we hear the voice in our head questioning us and probably holding us back when new commitments are to be taken?
When we re-recognize the courage in us, maybe that's when we open up new opportunities and our ability to trust and commit again.
Wednesday, April 08, 2009 @11:18 PM
I think it's getting too emotional here and it's about time i post about something happier.
Of cos the first happy news is that my favourite boy is back :) It seems that he left not too long ago and now he's back here, it makes me feel happy, much happier in fact. I must give special thanks to the fierce competition in the airlines that causes the price of the tickets to be at their lowest.
The next happy issue.... actually there isn't anymore happy issue. Goodness, I didn't realised my life is so sad.
This weekend will be extra lonely cos both my parents plus the cousin whom i always bully will be in
Msia. I will be all alone at home with the television blasting to fill the empty house. I will probably end up doing stupid things of which i have not decided. Maybe i will end up being really retarded like hogging the Internet all day long and blogging a really extremely long post. But then again, i would have nothing to blog about. Right, i cant believe i faced difficulty in doing stupid, brainless things.
Oh well, there's always four buddies to keep me accompany- namely Macroeconomics, Prices and Market, investment law and business statistic. I think i should seek satisfaction in conquering all of them and getting As, right?
oh man, i don't feel any happier. If anything, it made me sadder.
Tuesday, April 07, 2009 @10:21 PM
Falling the first time was being silly, to fall the second time is simply being stupid. I am not planning to be stupid.
It was plain disappointment that she felt. She was trying to justify her feelings and emotions only to realised that it was simply anger, disappointment and the hard feelings of betrayal. The world that she thought was her everything, the things that she thought would be constant and unchanged seems too vulnerable. Everything that she held close to her heart, the ones that she chose priority over, grew further and more distant everyday. She should have realised, you were no longer there like you used to. The things that they stood for became part of the past. She know it would not be the same especially with another person in your life who is more impt but she just didnt realised fast enough that it will be that different. She felt betrayed like she never felt before. People do change afterall, and its scary that they changed so fast. Friends? It's just a adjective without meaning afterall.Hello, the hard realistic world.